When Lisa Dixon, Scarborough Borough Council (SBC) Director of Legal & Democratic Services put me on the naughty table on Monday 18 January she offered me a contract:

“This means that where you email the Council, or make contact in any other way, you will not receive a response. Your emails to @scarborough.gov.uk email adddresses will be diverted to a single point of contact email account and will be read and dealt with where it is considered appropriate to do so.”

I am delighted to accept this contract.

As SBC have achieved their usual level of incompetence while putting me on the naughty table there are many challenges I could make.

• Potential Challenge 1

I have already covered Lisa’s attempt at time travel in Lisa Dixon – Back To The Future.

I will make no challenge to this as I am delighted to accept this contract.

• Potential Challenge 2

The image above is a copy of the email that the notice of my new naughty boy status was attached to.

NB: The email is signed Complaints Officer and is in font Calibri 11.

This is in breach of the SBC Email Usage Guidelines and thus makes everything nul and void. I quote 6.3 Email Signatures:

“Email signatures should be used to provide relevant contact information to the recipient; they should not be used for any other purpose. Your signature should include the following mandatory information: name, post, service unit, Scarborough Borough Council, email, telephone, website. All text should be in Tahoma font, size 8 and follow the standard layout below.”

I will make no challenge to this as I am delighted to accept this contract.

I could go on but the above adequately highlights the incompetence yet again of SBC/Lisa Dixon.

Contract Accepted

SBC and Lisa Dixon in yet another moment of madness have offered me, a Parking Campaigner,  a contract for six months that means they are unable to enforce against me a Fixed Penalty Notice or a Penalty Charge Notice for a “parking breach” as they will not be able to process my appeal in my chosen format – a letter.

Oh, happy days.

This means I can invite say 20 friends to join me in a SBC Car Park where I can then park all vehicles free of charge and SBC can do nothing about it.

There is only one question I ask – Can you issue me a lifetime ban please our Lisa?

Happy To Meet

It goes without saying I am happy to meet, subject to Covid restrictions, with the current or next SBC Administration to get them out of the mess Lisa has created for them and the challenges they face with SIAM.